Today I want to talk to you about achieving the zen of the wood chip. Now if you are like me you would have seen this title and immediately thought to yourself what nonsense! Because truly, who would want to give up being like a cat to become more like a wood chip? But then you would have clicked the link anyway because your curiosity would have gotten the better of you. Curiosity, cats... you get the picture. The point is, I understand your skepticism. However, I am not proposing you become like a wood chip, simply that you master a state of mind that will enhance your life.
Yes, I am stating that embracing the zen of the wood chip will improve your naps.
You see, sometimes as cats we just enjoy sleeping on precarious piles. Napping in an impossible location that could topple at any moment but doesn't leads to the ultimate joy in napping. The trick is learning not to fall off. Nobody likes to have their perfect nap interrupted by gravity and a tumbling pile of towels scattering you across the floor just as you were about to catch that catnip mouse. If you like sleeping on topsy turvy towers of laundry or a slippery stack of letters I am offering you advice that will help you to achieve the perfect nap in perilous locations.
"Why not just sleep in a safer spot?" you ask.
"Get behind me dog." I say
Can you truly call yourself a cat if you have not achieved at least one impossible thing a day? Be it defying the laws of gravity, or visibility, or even Murphy, if you are not achieving the impossible you are either a foolish human or a dog, but you are no cat. (I think the fact that dogs are such failures makes people feel less terrible about their own inadequacies. There can't be any other reason that dogs are called man's best friend. But I digress).
Machiavelli wrote "Never was anything great achieved without danger." He was right. And cats do not settle for anything less than greatness. So the next time you are sleeping on a leaning tower of letters or a human who likes to toss and turn at night, meditate on the way of the wood chip. A wood chip is irrepressible. A wood chip calmly and without the least hint of effort floats through the water as it swirls and plunges. A wood chip sails serenely atop the water as if waterfalls are but momentary trouble. Wood chips always come up smiling. Bigger sticks and other objects collect water, gain weight, sink, get caught on snags and hidden obstacles. A wood chip has none of these problems. Wood chips always seem to float gaily along on top of the angry frothing water. No matter how turbulent the water beneath, the wood chip always ends up circling lazily in an eddy or bobbing along merrily to its next destination. Waterfalls are not worth mentioning, a slippery stack of papers is nothing.
Meditate on the way of the wood chip. If you achieve the zen of the wood chip you too can float happily and lazily atop the froth of fuzzy blankets. A human may toss and turn underneath you and you will float effortlessly atop the blankets serenely impervious to their movements. No matter which way they might turn if you nap with the zen of the wood chip you will roll easily with their agitated tossing and come up smiling, ever atop the agitated surface below.
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| "dsc_0814" photo via Flickr by JB |
Meditate on the zen of the wood chip. Enter into a state of mind
like a wood chip. Simplicity. A wood chip has no cares and you, as a cat, are on equal footing. You are small. You are graceful. You cannot be
waterlogged and sink. You are weightless. You always float. You are
free.
A stack of towels or letters may slide out from underneath you as you nap. But the zen of the wood chip will allow you to float effortlessly on top unaffected by the danger of gravity. You will swirl lazily in a calm eddy while the letters cascade away beneath you. You will only continue your easy journey downstream when you choose to do so, not when the waters around you move.
Nap with abandon my friends for you are a wood chip floating freely along the dangerous waters of life with effortless grace. You will achieve great things because danger does not intimidate you and because you carry yourself with dignity and beauty and an elegant simplicity. That is to say, you will achieve greatness because you are a cat.
I wish you the best naps. May you always achieve the zen of the wood chip.
As ever, I am at your service because it pleases me to be so.
xx
Miss Kitty
